Biggest Disappointments of the Failed Mayan Prophecy

Well, December 21^st has officially passed, you know, that dreaded day the Mayan’s predicted would be the end of the world, I’m sure you’re all quite familiar with it by now. And although the Mayans were wrong (surprised?), the world didn't end (yay!), and we’re ever so thankful for it, yada yada yada, we have a few bones to pick over the whole ordeal. I value the continuation of life and all that good stuff, but to be honest, I was looking forward to some things ending. If the Mayans were right, we wouldn't have to experience those everyday annoyances or see certain events come to fruition. Here are a few of the things I would like to be eliminated.

Snooki’s Parenting Responsibilities
2012 proved to be a darker year for…well, everyone. As news outlets rolled out the horrifying headlines of Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi, that notorious talent-less alcoholic from The Jersey Shore, being pregnant, everyone cringed at the thought of her being responsible for another human being (I think she cringed as well).

"You seriously trust me with a baby? I don't even trust myself to use the bathroom effectively."

If the Mayans were right, we wouldn't have to witness the train wreck of a situation this will become. Maybe I’m wrong though, maybe she’ll keep it up on the straight and narrow path. But as most evidence suggests otherwise, I’d really rather not find out how this one ends.

"The baby has to start sometime..."

Nicolas Cage Movies

Need I say more? What are these movies even about anymore?! Bangkok Dangerous, Next and Knowing are a few among many of his movies that leave you scratching your head. The titles themselves don’t even give an indication of what they're about!

There he is folks, drink him in.

From the ridiculous hair to the accents that last for the first five minutes of the movie, then suddenly disappear, Nicolas Cage was once a highly regarded and critically acclaimed actor, but is now seen by the general public as an immediate flaw to any movie. Personally, I’ll give his movies a try, it’s always a surprise. Sometimes they’re entertaining, sometimes they’re train wrecks, and more often than not, they're a good mixture of both. I’m not asking for Cage to be eliminated from existence, but maybe just banned from movies...forever.

“Put the Cage back in the box!”

There are, of course, many other big disappointments that are the result of the failed Mayan prophecy, such as The Black Eyed Peas continuing to exist as well as the countless other tragedies of our declining culture, but Nicolas Cage movies and the very thought of Snooki being a parent are disappointments felt across the country...maybe even the world.