Life Lessons I Learned From Ghost Hunting School

I live a pretty tame life.  School, homework, sleep, repeat.  Pretty straightforward and not the most interesting thing ever.  That is, until I saw the greatest thing I have ever seen, an Introduction to Ghost Hunting class.  I had to do this.  So I signed up to become a Certified Ghost Hunter and immediately started  learning the ins and outs of ghost hunting.  It was a five week program and I received all the lessons in PDF form.  The class was 20 pages long.

Easily the proudest moment of my life.

Now, one would assume that this class is a total joke.  One could not be more wrong.  Introduction to Ghost Hunting has not only taught me how to effectively hunt ghosts, but taught me some great life lessons.

Know your goals and boundaries

The first lesson of the class was looking at your inner self and asking the questions of what do I want to get out of this course?  What is a goal of mine after the class?  Why the hell did I sign up for an online ghost hunting class?

I guess this is why I signed up.

Setting goals is a common practice in most people's lives.  Goals give us motivation, a reason to wake up in the morning, and are kind of like the light at the end of the tunnel.  We must focus on these and work hard to achieve them, which will hopefully give us a sense of accomplishment.  The exception being a toddler in a tiara, then you accomplish things for your parents who failed at everything when they were growing up.

"Does this dress hide my bingo wings?"

"Aren't I so beau...I mean, isn't little Sandy so beautiful?"

Childhood depression in 3...2...1...

This class has taught me to choose goals that are realistic and make sure we know our boundaries.  If we choose a goal that is beyond our reach and completely unattainable or something we will lose interest in, then what is the point of pursuing it?  There is none.  It just sets us up for failure.  That is when we become lazy, sit at home in bed, and write a blog.

Learn your true interests

What attracts us to activities?  Excitement?  Advertisements?  Boredom?  Fun?  Well, this class has taught me to look deeper than that.  Those are feelings that scratch the surface.

I do this to impress the ladies.

I was asked the question:
What attracts you to ghost hunting?
Well, I don't know...it seems fun?  
Are you looking for proof of ghosts? 
Sure.
What would you need to encounter to feel that you've found enough proof?
I don't know.  
Is your interest more scientific or spiritual?
I don't know.
Are you a skeptic?
I don't know.
Are you doing this for fun?  Does it have to be fun?  How frightened are you willing to be, before you leave a haunted site or quit ghost hunting?
This class sucks.

At this point I thought I may be in over my head.  Do I really want to go through with this?  Is this a genuine interest?  Yes.  Yes it is.  This got me thinking about other things that I do and determine if I actually enjoy them.  An enlightening statement was how people "often lose their focus and continue ghost hunting after it stops being interesting or fun.  Or, they spend too much time or money before realizing that the topic never interested them much anyway."

Be aware of yourself

Not only must you be aware of the EMF (Electro Magnetic Field) readings in your house and around you, but it is just as important that you be aware of yourself.  Before going on any ghost hunt, you must "baseline yourself" for at least three days.  This involves recording your emotional and psychic temperatures multiple times a day.  You must ask yourself: "Are you happy, sad, or somewhere in between?  Are you feeling calm, a little anxious, or even a little eager?  What about your physical wellbeing?  How's your energy level?"  It's basically a multi-daily physical.

"Alright big boy, turn your head and cough."

Examine your full self, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, psychically, and physically.  This allows you to study yourself and see how you are functioning on a normal week.  How well do you know yourself?  Being aware of your life can only bring positivity, unless your life sucks, but now you can be aware of how much it does.

Safety

"If you encounter someone frightening - living or dead - you should not be alone."  These are words to live by.  If you run into a dead person, it is helpful to have a friend handy with some extra pants.  Oh, they are also supposed to help you be safe, and stay alive.  Since cell phones are not reliable (EMF waves may cause malfunctioning), a cohort is nice to have to watch your back.

Dammit, did you go ghost hunting and shit your pants again?

Spiritual protection is a must.  You ever see movies will devils and ghosts?  Yeah, they are stopped by some sort of protective item.  A clove of garlic, a Bible, pentacle, blessed salt, or "lucky socks" are examples given.  Atheists kind of got the shaft on this safety step because they were told to use a "childhood cuddle blanket".  Is there anything more demeaning than a ghost hunter using a baby blanket for comfort?  Here's a tip: If you show up to a ghost hunt with a baby blanket to cuddle when you get scared, you will lose all credibility...and your friends.

I couldn't make a picture cool enough to represent an Atheist cuddling a blanket.

Here's the Beek crying.

Ghost hunting involves investigating haunted places at night.  These places include woods, cemeteries, old houses, and other places with dangerous terrain.  The dangers these places present are why they recommend scouting the place you plan on going during the day.  By doing this, you can spot potential hazards and dangerous obstacles you might have to traverse while running away screaming.

Well, there you have it, life lessons learned from Ghost Hunting school.  Not so much of a joke anymore, right?  I encourage everyone to give this course a try and take in, not only the ghost hunting knowledge, but also the important lessons we all need to embrace.  Enhance your life here.